Many distinct types of horror exist. Most hinge on the idea of not knowing what is going on around you: the absence of knowledge. Or they hinge on not being able to do anything about the things around you: the absence of action.
This creates a duality where one coexists with yet is in an imbalance with the other. There is either an absence of knowledge or absence of action: when one is present, the other is lacking. This duality drives conflict.
The problem with this style of horror is the fourth wall, the knowledge that everything is fiction and cannot cause any harm. Because of this fourth wall between the player and the game the absence of knowledge and action’s effects are lessened.
This is where the idea of “meta horror” strives. Meta horror’s goal is to break down the fourth wall and any other boundaries between the player and the horror. Meta horror doesn’t outright abandon the formerly established ideas on how to scare but instead expands on it by breaking down the fourth wall.
Eternal Darkness: Sanity’s Requiem was the first horror game of its kind, scaring players in avenues not previously thought of. Eternal Darkness was released in 2002 exclusively for the GameCube, both the time and the consoles limitations led to a less refined version of meta horror but one that still scared just as well.
Fake ending screen in Eternal Darkness.
In Eternal Darkness a sanity system can affect how the game scares, the bar starts full and slowly empties as time goes on. Starting with minor changes such as noises with no source or even skewing the camera a tiny amount. As the player’s sanity bar gets lower more extreme effects happen such as faking deleting the player’s save file, abruptly ending the game claiming a sequel is in the works, or even having the player character die spontaneously.
While Eternal Darkness got many things right, the game was limited by its hardware and development time. It created a great base for many other games to work off in the future.
Imscared: a Pixelated Nightmare picked up where Eternal Darkness left off and is considered by most to be the most influential and notable meta horror game. Imscared was one of the first meta horror games to be released on pc and it makes use of that fact. Imscared holds no punches when trying to scare the player, using more traditional methods like jump scares to opening a YouTube video in the background without your knowledge.
The horror of Imscared does not just leave the player frightened but leaves them questioning whether they are safe even after closing the game. Imscared achieves this effect by many means for example, faking that the game is closed only to jump scare the player, creating new files and images on the player’s desktop, and even faking that the player’s computer crashed.
DDLC is the last game mentioned here because it strays away from the two other games preestablished ideas of horror. DDLC breaks down that fourth wall by deceiving the player from before they even start the game. It masks itself as a cute visual novel, a genre of game that focuses on player choices, interactions with the story, and less gameplay.
DDLC chooses not to scare the player with jumpscares but instead disturb the player. The first act of the game starts normal by all means but by the time of the second act the player starts to notice cracks in the game. Small instances of abnormalities not mentioned before. All of this culminates in the third act revealing all of horrific elements of the world that the player had come to love.
The three games mentioned above are not the only meta horror games but they were pioneers of the genre and are each in their own way still affecting the meta horror genre today.
Counter Strike: Global Offensive (CS:GO) is one of the most prolific games of all time, and in March of this past year Valve announced the long-awaited sequel, Counter Strike 2 (CS2).
CS2 promised a lot with its reveal: completely overhauled graphics, sub-tick technology, and volumetric smokes. Now just over six months later everyone has access to CS2. Has Valve delivered on their promises or were they flaunting a new game for a quick bump in players?
It is important to note that when talking about CS2, CS:GO was also buggy and unbalanced when it was first released. Only after years of working on the game with feedback from the community did CS:GO become the game it is today.
With that fact in mind, CS2 right now is a buggy mess unlike the now crisp CS:GO.
CS2 released with many changes, the biggest being the UI. The player’s HUD is completely different compared to CS:GO, changing the location of the player’s health and ammo with a sleeker more modern design.
Inferno’s “church”
The UI changes don’t stop there though. They overhauled the buy menu opting for a simpler design compared to the circle menu found in CS:GO.
CS2 has notably forgotten about a beloved setting found in cs:go cl_righthand. This setting would change if your gun model was on the left or right side of your screen. It’s absence from CS2 has left many questioning why they would remove this tactical advantage.
The UI wasn’t the only major overhaul found in CS2. Along with it came a brand-new set of visuals. While CS:GO’s graphics did improve as the years went on, it was always limited by the twenty-year-old source engine.
CS2 abandons that limitation, and it flourishes graphically because of that. Equipped with a new “raytracing esque” lighting system and new textures, the game looks visually stunning on higher settings and is still good-looking on lower settings. But graphics aren’t everything.
Inferno’s “Apartments”
CS2 also chose to change the outdated tick system. Previously, CS:GO relayed what happened every 64th of a second to the main servers, this is also true in CS2. The difference in the two systems is that CS2 records where you are looking when you shoot. Previously CS:GO shot where you are looking at when that shot registered with the server. Theoretically this will be more accurate to what happens but for those with a bad connection this can feel unfair because they seemingly die behind cover.
The gameplay of CS2 is by far the worst part of the game. Most of the community has come to the consensus that the game does not feel as clean as CS:GO did. Both the gunplay and movement feel unresponsive and laggy. This is not helped by the fact that sub-tick heavily favors those with lower ping.
The last major change to CS2 is volumetric smokes. This changed how smoke grenades work entirely. Instead of releasing a ball of smoke that would block vision and penetrate walls, the smoke conforms to the area and objects around it.
Along with this change, came a new way of walking and seeing through smoke. An H.E. grenade’s detonation clears a temporary opening for a person to see or shoot through. These volumetric smokes are executed very well and surprisingly do not cause any major FPS drops.
Despite so many major changes to cs:go’s fundamentals, CS2 still keeps true to what CS:GO built. With that being said, CS2 is a long away from being completed but it will only reach that state if the community sticks with it and helps improve what’s wrong.
When discussing the worst games ever made many people jump to games like E.T. for the Atari or the original release for Final Fantasy 14, maybe even No Man’s Sky. These games are among some of the most buggy, poorly designed, and rushed games in history. But what if the worst game wasn’t buggy at all? What if it had 8 years of development time? What if it had a good concept with a strong base to build off of? The game that fits into all three of these criteria? YiiK, stylized as YIIK and pronounced YEEK.
YiiK is a self-described “Post Modern RPG” with all the classic RPG elements: turn-based combat, quick-time events, and party members.
YiiK follows Alex Eggleston, a college graduate coming back to his hometown, while meeting the protagonist the player will encounter the biggest flaw in the entire game, the writing.
Long droning monologues that provide context already given to the player combined with an extremely unlikable and static protagonist culminate in making some of the most difficult writing to sit through.
Arguably the worst part about the writing is the lack of consequences to Alex’s actions. Alex is constantly the worst person possible in every situation or interaction and unlike games such as The Witcher or Skyrim, these actions aren’t the players’ choice, it’s just who the character is, what he says, what he does.
After playing the game for some time players may expect Alex to grow throughout the story, even if that growth isn’t earned story wise. This doesn’t happen. Alex stays the same morally questionable, sometimes even morally reprehensible character that only thinks about himself, and the game agrees with him.
(the next paragraph contains spoilers for YiiK, if you would like to play the game, please skip it)
Throughout the game Alex only thinks about himself, hetruly believes the world revolves around him and at the end of the game it’s revealed that the world does. While I won’t get into massive lore details just know that Alex is right in believing that he is the most important in the universe by virtue of being Alex Eggleston.
While the writing may be bad, that alone wouldn’t ruin a game. The combat mechanics of the game also help to make it the worst game.
Slow, basic, and repetitive are used best to describe the combat of YiiK. At first glance the combat system may not seem horrible; this illusion is washed away by the end of the first hour of gameplay. To understand the games short comings, it’s important to look a game that did this combat style, based around timing inputs, well.
Paper Mario, for the N64. This game had one of the most innovative combat systems found in a turn-based RPG, letting the players’ skill determine how much damage is done. On top of the skill-based combat it also hosted a large variety of moves/attacks. This is where YiiK fumbles.
YiiK’s combat system does not change. The best moves or attack order will always stay the same, there is no room for variety in the game. Another major problem with YiiK is the scripted fights/losses. Multiple times throughout the story you MUST lose in a fight to progress, this is disheartening when playing.
It sows a sense of doubt into the player. It makes them wonder if they even need to try for this boss. If it would just be better to lose instead of trying just in case. And that mindset isn’t even wrong. It would be easier to just lose every boss before actually attempting them.
The last important thing to mention is how much potential that YiiK had. The game had some of the best video game composers making music for it. YiiK also had an interesting idea; a unique art style that was modern while still being blocky/polygonal.
That’s my biggest problem with YiiK. It had potential, YiiK could’ve been a great game and it still can be. Currently the developers are working on the 1.5 update, this update is promised to change the problems that plague the game. Changing the story direction, improving combat and the dungeons found in the game. This update could be what the game needs to switch from being the punchline of jokes to being a great game. When it comes out, I will be playing it and I implore you too as well.
Without memories, what do we have left? How do we fill our life with meaning?
As a stream of seemingly unimportant home video clippings flood through the screen, Jonas Mekas contemplates these very questions, intercutting scenes with splices of poetry and thoughts in his massive four hour, forty-eight-minute masterpiece: As I Was Moving Ahead I Occasionally Saw Brief Glimpses of Beauty, where the audience is taken on a journey through the pages of a man’s life.
It is a film without plot or structure, and seemingly without any importance, but it is the substance within these small moments in montage, that when all together, create an undeniable representation of the human condition.
This memoir is less structured like a documentary but more like music or poetry. Unlike a book, the film expresses memory through words, music, and narration. Intertitles and images combine not just to describe memory but to share it. You see the world with wonder and weariness through the eyes of Jonas Mekas.
In short, to ask, What is the meaning of this film? Is to ask, what is the meaning of life.
Leaving Lithuania, he became imprisoned in a German labor camp with his brother, and after escaping they went into hiding in a farm near the Danish border.
When the second World War ended, he moved to the United States, bought a camera, and started shooting documentary movies.
Today he is known as the godfather of American avant-garde cinema.
In 1961, he and twenty-one other independent mostly experimental filmmakers including Andy Warhol founded The Filmmakers Cooperative, a non-profit distribution center for a new age of avant-garde film.
He soon became one of the most influential names of the New Cinema Movement creating inventive and unique documentary films including Reminiscences of a Journey to Lithuania (1972) and He Stands in the Desert Counting the Seconds of his Life (1987).
Brief Glimpses of Beauty came out in 2000 and is a culmination of his style.
I’ve had some trepidations about writing an article on this film because it’s so massive, yet understated and most importantly, unconventional.
It’s a rare opportunity for an audience to see a person’s life on film, comparable to Gordon Parks’ Moments Without Proper Names, but not parallel in sheer length and substance.
As a reoccurring intertitle reads: Nothing happens in this film. Later corrected with: Everything happens in this film.
As I Was Moving Ahead Occasionally I Saw Brief Glimpses of Beauty is an optimistic film about life, but also a weary film, made by a man aware of his mortality, reflecting on scraps of memory, coming to terms with age, the past and dying.
Jonas Mekas says it best, in the opening words of the film, “I have never been able, really to figure out where my life begins and where it ends. . . There is some kind of order in it—order of its own, which I do not really understand, same as I never understood life around me. The real life, as they say, or the real people, I never understood them. I still do not understand them, and I do not really want to understand them.”
EPISODE FIVE: CHANCE FOR CHANGE By Dairell Alvarico Hosted by Hailey Boehme
Official Transcript:
[THEME SONG – KOLBY THOMPSON.]
Hailey Boehme:
Good to see you again, everyone. From Mustang Post News, this is Sheyenne Perspectives. I’m Hailey Boehme.
In our last episode of Sheyenne Perspectives, Carter Phillips delved into creativity’s drive on the theatrical stage.
This week Dairell Alvarico focuses on a chance for change through the personal experiences of new student immigrants, their personal struggles, and their joys.
Here’s Dairell.
Dairell Alvarico: In my last podcast, I discussed the concept of change in the lunchroom and how students adapt into various environments that come their way. To add a little insight, the majority did not want to change at all, they would rather stay consistent.
Now that we have gathered more understanding towards the topic, I figured I’d branch out more on the subject. Change does not limit in the lunchroom, it also affects people’s lives aside from school; giving them the opportunity to pave a path they made for themselves, and grasping the new obstacles that would either be used to improve their personal development or bring up walls of regret that would take time to break down.
One circumstance that checks off this list is the process of adapting into a whole new country. This type of change exceeds most struggles relating to the lunchroom; trying to find a vacant spot near the restroom does not compare to the anxiety of not knowing what the next step is when you are in an unfamiliar area.
A lot of students here in Sheyenne Highschool moved in America from all distinct parts of the world, learning their ways, and experiencing new heights of appreciation or depreciation towards change.
The American Dream. People who moved here are bound to hear that term at some point, maybe a lot. Great jobs, great pay, more opportunities, and benefits: Land of the Free. But how does this romanticized expectation change their lives in the long run?
This episode, I have gathered stories of fellow immigrants. All of them have something to share, something to reflect on, to reveal that the life of an immigrant is not easy at first, there is always going to be something that holds them back.
Now we get to hear what they’ve been through, what they learned, and how they developed their skills and abilities to adapt to the U.S and finally call this place their home.
There’s always a beginning to all this. Something that convinced them to make the decision to move here. Coincidentally, they are not that different from each other.
Jacob: Apparently my, like my parents found out this like job that was here in the U.S, through Facebook which is probably the most oddest thing you’ll ever see, in Facebooks. And then like we had like go to like the Bureaucratic nightmare of the Philippines. And we like go up and down to these bureaucratic offices, and we uh had to really like ask them, if they’re willing to do it. They had to like beg them.”
Manila (Capital of the Philippines)
Dairell Alvarico: Another student, whom we will call Sam, had a similar scenario, one that involved her dad and his drive to finish his education. Here is an excerpt from her story:
Sam: My father decided to come to America to get his master’s degree when I was in second grade. I was so astonished when I found out we were heading to America because I didn’t want to leave my friends and move out of Saudi Arabia to a place we had never visited before. We had argued with my dad about not wanting to go to America because first we didn’t speak the language, English, and we have no idea about America and how things over there work out.
Dairell Alvarico: Sam and Jacob’s experiences are not that far from each other. In their cases, it was their parents who set the motion to move to America.
This is a very common reason, especially on immigrant children. They may have never even thought of the U.S until their parents mentioned it, and when they do, they are also doing it to give their kids a better life. Like John, who was hesitant at first, but later saw this opportunity as a blessing in disguise, which he makes clear when he wrote his story.
John: Reasons why I moved here? To have a better tomorrow. Every immigrant would have the same answer as me, but the future my parents wanted me to have was an American Education. I wish I had a choice; I wish I could stay in the place I am used to, but I am here and I can’t do anything anymore. So, I have to do this.
Dairell Alvarico: John was supposed to move here when he already graduated high-school, but the plan changed and he arrived one year early. This took a toll on him; he wanted to graduate with his friends. He felt at home and didn’t want to spend his last high-school years in a whole new country, but his parents insisted.
This is one of the most difficult things to do to when moving. Leaving your friends and dreading making new ones, since it can be a bit overwhelming, thinking that you’re different than everybody else. It affects them so much, depleting their confidence and anticipation to learn new things.
John: Leaving my friends, the high-school graduation I always wanted, was so hard for me because I’m graduating here instead of home.
Dairell Alvarico: But John wasn’t alone on this one. Sam struggled among her peers as well.
Sam: I wasn’t fluent in English, only knew just a few basic phrases when I arrived in America. So, my first day of school wasn’t really great. When you travel from one country to another, everything is different: the language, friends, lifestyles, and so on. My teacher was giving me a school tour as I walked; to be honest, I didn’t even understand a single word and was just nodding my head the entire time, wanting to be over with it. My father came to get me out after 3rd period to see how I was doing. With tears in my eyes, I told my father that I wanted to go back.
Dairell Alvarico: English is a very widespread language, but not everybody knows it. And when it comes to moving to America, knowing English is what gets you through basic everyday life.
So, Sam was already a mess. She could not understand anything around her. Overcome with anxiety, her first few days were so bad, it was enough for her to want to go back home.
Jacob on the other hand, did not have these types of struggles. If anything, he actually anticipated moving to America. He was eager to experience things he couldn’t do in the Philippines, and won’t hesitate to share his opinions on it.
Jacob: A lot of stuff actually. I could just get like the stuff I want, that was like being imported before I get it. I had to get stuff like that, because they were imported and they’re expensive too, and I could just get it for a dollar and a half.
Dairell Alvarico: If you care to share, what’s like one negative thing that you experienced.
Jacob: I started working in fast food, ooh man they kinda, kinda entitled not gonna lie, like I don’t know like they’ve been requesting stuff that should not be, you know it’s not even part of their order.
Dairell Alvarico: While Sam and John were mostly worried about the people around them and how to cope with their new life, Jacob was more concerned about the transit system.
Jacob: I mean, I expected them to have like a good like, transportation system when I came here, you know you don’t need to ride a personal car. But then, we still had to buy a car.
Dairell Alvarico: To add more context, the transportation in the Philippines has multiple options. From calling a taxi to randomly riding on the back of a stranger’s motorcycle for less than two dollars.
There’s so many vehicles to pick from that not having your own personal vehicle isn’t a huge deal. So, in Jacob’s case, he wasn’t used to it at all.
There’s always a way to get comfortable with change. There’s time, and patience to adjust themselves to feel comfortable and safe in America.
Sam knew that her not knowing English held her back, so she did her very best to learn it.
Sam: Taking English classes has greatly helped and improved my English compared to when I first arrived. Being bilingual is uncommon in my country; yet, knowing how to communicate in another language, particularly English, opens doors to greater and more chances.
Sam: Looking back, I believe I would not be where I am today if I hadn’t gone through these obstacles. I felt like I wasn’t going to make it at the time, and that nothing I was doing, especially reading a book, would help me improve my English. However, I have discovered that no matter what you do, you will achieve a result.
Dairell Alvarico: John was still bummed out about leaving the people he’s close with, so he grew into his curiosity of experiencing what it’s like to be in America, slowly getting used to it.
John: Studying in Sheyenne is different to what I’m used to. But change is nice overall, I love understanding different cultures beyond what I’m used to. It’s nice on behalf of the weirdness and cultural shock. It’s nice to see what’s on the other side of the wall (metaphorically)
John: The silver lining is I became a better person here, I lost mostly everything I ever was, but I became the person I thought I would be.
Dairell Alvarico: Everybody has a certain reaction moving to America. Fear, excitement, anxiety or all of them at once. But what really matters if how they push through and adapt into the people they are now. Change can be scary, mainly because it’s what would push people to a different path than they predicted.
The people in these stories did see it through, because there’s always a way when it comes to change. They accepted it, found their peace and paved a new path for themselves.
“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change” Jim Rohn, a motivational speaker said that and I am confident to say that these people’s stories are proof that this quote is true.
Change can be a good thing, it’s just pretty bad at the start. Immigration can be just like that. All you got to do is guide it to the right direction.
[THEME SONG – KOLBY THOMPSON.]
Hailey Boehme: This podcast was recorded and edited by Dairell Alvarico and hosted by Hailey Boehme.
Sheyenne Perspectives theme music was composed and performed by Kolby Thompson under the direction of Mark Berntson. Thank you, Dave and Jewelyn, for narrating the excerpts. We’d also like to thank Sam, John, and Jacob for sharing their wonderful stories.
This wraps up Sheyenne Perspectives for this school year. We appreciate you, our listeners, and hope you’ve enjoyed Sheyenne Perspectives.
SOUND: THEME SONG FADE IN TO FULL THEN FADE TO LOW
Welcome back, everyone. From Mustang Post News, West Fargo, this is Sheyenne Perspectives. I’m Hailey Boehme.
SOUND: THEME SONG FULL
SOUND: THEME SONG INCREASE (5 to 10 seconds)
HAILEY BOEME Hey everyone! It’s your host, Hailey Boehme, and I’m here to welcome you back to another episode of Sheyenne Perspectives from Mustang Post News.
In our last episode of Sheyenne Perspectives, Jaxson Miller delved into the human desire to create and share those creations.
This week Carter Phillips continues our series by taking a look at Sheyenne High School’s theatre department, creativity and where it comes from.
CARTER PHILLIPS
MARLYNE LALIBERTE
My name is Marlyne Laliberte and I am the theatre director of Sheyenne high school and I’m also the senior English teacher for composition and literature.
CARTER PHILLIPS
MARYLNE LALIBERTE
Everything that was invented was created by an artist. You have to create to evolve, so what I mean by that is, even the person-
If you created and car, if you created the wheel, if you created a chair, if you created the computer heh! –
No matter what it is, it’s all created by an artist. Artists think outside the box.
MARYLYNE LALIBERTE
First, I think it’s the desire. All desire comes from the soul, comes from the heart. Sometimes that’s our only motivation, is that we need to. We need to create. Express ourselves. I guess it’s a form of expression. Yeah. So, first it’s a desire and need to express and need to improve; make yourself better somehow; get your ideas out.
MARYLINE LALIBERTE
You need to trust. So, for me as a teacher, you have to be comfortable in your environment. You have to trust the people that are around you, because you’ll close up. You won’t do anything. You won’t let yourself go, and see that you can trust others around you, you will bloom, and you will want to create even more.
CARTER PHILLIPS
And the most important question of all. Where does creativity come from?
MARYLINE LALIBERTE
know I teach so many seniors and I ask them with a profile of a graduate- What we do here. So, you can graduate. And one page is called creativity and I have a handful of students- More than a handful, of students who [say,] “I won’t create. I don’t know how to create. I haven’t created.” So, I have to really talk to them about what creativity really means.
Some people, you know, I really believe it’s- Your born with the desire to create. And whether it’s the right side of your brain or the left, I’m not sure, but maybe it’s your soul or your heart.
You know, my reason how I want to create and how my theatre students want to create is, they have- they love it. They love expressing themselves and it’s fun.
CARTER PHILLIPS
This podcast was recorded and edited by Logan Jacobs and hosted by Hailey Boehme. Sheyenne Perspectives theme music was composed and performed by Kolby Thompson under the direction of Mark Berntson. A special thanks goes out to Anthony Peterson.
HAILEY BOEME
SOUND: FADE IN (THEME SONG)
This podcast was recorded and edited by Carter Phillips and hosted by Hailey Boehme. Sheyenne Perspectives theme music was composed and performed by Kolby Thompson under the direction of Mark Berntson (BURNT-son). Thank you Marylin LaLiberte for your insight and time contributing to this episode.
SOUND: FADE IN–DUCKING (THEME SONG)
Next week Dairell Alvarico will wrap up this school year’s Sheyenne Perspectives podcast series with her focus on a chance for change through the personal experiences of new student immigrants, their personal struggles, and their joys.
EPISODE THREE: CREATIVES IN CINEMA By Carter M. Phillips
Official Transcript:
SOUND: THEME SONG FADE IN TO FULL THEN FADE TO LOW
Welcome back, everyone. From Mustang Post News, West Fargo, this is Sheyenne Perspectives. I’m Hailey Boehme.
SOUND: THEME SONG FULL
You know, sometimes things just don’t turn out the way you expected. Snow days. Illnesses. Absences. And general bad luck. But! We’re back on track with our latest podcast.
In our last episode of Sheyenne Perspectives, Logan Jacobs reflected on success in the music industry.
SOUND: THEME SONG FADE
This week Carter Phillips continues our series through the lens of creativity and why people are driven to use it both the stage and behind the camera. Here’s Carter.
SOUND: THEME SONG INCREASE (5 to 10 seconds)
CARTER M. PHILLIPS
What will last after we are gone? Art and brick might be the only things in this world that outlive us. And can the inhuman read without a Rosetta stone, or admire music without understanding the words? They can see images, and people, alive, in movement.
Cinema is immortal, and perhaps that is why it fascinates me. It creates the illusion of time incomplete, and frozen.
No other form of art can better show what it is like to be human, to show you a soul in a human face and to show a heart in a hand.
Maybe that is why, regardless of failing, I keep making movies. Regardless of the stress, pain, and disappointment, I never plan on stopping.
To surrender to conventional and hardships would be to let my friends down, who help me make my movies.
These are the words of my friends, who made movies.
GAVIN VILLAREAL (Gav-in Vil-are-Eel)
I was there and Aiden was there and Tuker was there, we were all getting ready to film and all that stuff and we had to do this scene where we had to poor blood on Carters face, but like the blood was, what was it? Like cool aid mix-
AIDEN VILLAREAL
It was crystal light Gavin
GAVIN VILLAREAL
-or some stuff like that, but it stained my shirt permanently but whatever.
AIDEN VILLAREAL
Crystal light. Oh, it was Crystal light Gavin.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
Crystal Light, I can’t even remember.
CARTER PHILLIPS
Yeah, it was crystal light. It was the Fruit punch flavor.
GAVIN VILLARAEL
Yeah, so we had to do that. And we had to poor it on your face. And yeah, it ended up getting in your eye. It was- HA HA
GAVIN VILLAREAL
Hello, my name is Gavin Villareal and I’m a junior in high school and I go to Wahpeton High School in Wahpeton North Dakota.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
[They] Came from the Attic, that was an amazing film, I loved to work on. That was amazing, that was fun. I mean of course I didn’t get as much to work on with that, but you know, still fun to make, nevertheless. Um and then, ah Sometime after Midnight.
CARTER PHILLIPS
As started the conversation our topic, swayed into the trials and errors of filmmaking. He just, quite simply started talking about his experiences on a set and things he’s seen me go through and things he’s seen some of his other cast and crew members go through.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
I mean I’m not really a director myself, but I do new- I do know thing or two about it, so you know, I know the trouble it is to like, you know, shoot and film and ‘do it again, do it again’ you know. That’s a big trouble when it comes to creating.
CARTER PHILLIPS
Gavin started talking about what makes a person creative whether its through being influenced on something or perhaps a spark that ignites in your mind and I began questioning him on if it was better or worse to be influenced by something or if it was better or worse to come up with it on your own.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
I think what makes a person creative is when are um- they have a unique idea that isn’t too similar to others. Like I know how people get they’re creativity. Sometimes they get it from other people, but you know, I feel like being really, like really creative would be having your own main idea when it comes down to like, I guess you could say movies and shows and stuff like that you know.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
I feel like some people when they make like, I guess you could say, short stories or things like that, I feel like there’s people who make it just so they can get popular or people that actually put time and effort into it and therefore [are] making, you know, creative stories.
CARTER PHILLIPS
He started talking about the advantages that occur when you’re working with friends instead of colleagues apposed to friends, or rather when your colleagues are your friends; and the atmosphere that brings apposed to an entirely professional one.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
Even when you’re shooting and like, uh, just hanging out, your still like having a good time. Your still like hanging out but like, doing something and usually when you’re doing that something your more serious but like we also have a good time we also laugh, you know, all that fun stuff.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
For us, it makes it better cause we know each other, and you know, it’s easier to act for like different things and stuff like that. We know each other’s like, I guess, set of emotions and all that so, uh I guess, it’s easier for us to have a role that you know [that we would] best [be] played in.
GAVIN VILLAREAL
An average scene? Well, when we’re not messing around uh, probably get like an average scene done in like a half hour if we’re lucky enough.
CARTER PHIILLIPS
Those roles need a beginning, an inception. And that’s where the role of the creative begins. The beginning of creation. That initial idea that leads to shared art.
As my microphone waited for me to speak, I looked down at my hands and saw they’re cracked and weary skin with strayed strands of winkles unfit for a boy of 17, and at the mirror saw my eyes somber and meaningless, declaring emptiness with they’re soundless piercing look, staring at me. What do they long for? What does anybody long for?
I can’t go on living without goals and motivation, without feeling like I’m doing something worthwhile. WE can’t live like this. As humans we desire art. To experience it? To make it? Are they not one in the same?
A person closes their eyes and dreams and is that not art of its own. Maybe the best movie is the one happening outside your window, with gains and losses and good and bad. Art is a mere reflection, refracting images into a vague contraption of mirrors inside our minds. Where do these ideas come from? Where do we come from? How does art confront this?
If it got an audience in the first place, who loved it and cherished it, is that not good enough? For a person to give something to the world instead of take something, to make a film belong to humanity itself, to be construed, loved, hated, believed in, subjectifies and objectified. They are like people, alive and received, but more so they are like my memories and remain linked with the eras in which I made them, a trophy for my work.
This podcast was recorded and edited by Logan Jacobs and hosted by Hailey Boehme. Sheyenne Perspectives theme music was composed and performed by Kolby Thompson under the direction of Mark Berntson. Special thanks goes out to Anthony Peterson.
HAILEY BOEME In our next release of Sheyenne Perspectives, Jaxson Miller be taking a look at wins and losses and the highs and lows of those moments especially when those wins and losses are unexpected.
This issue of the Mustang Post is a special release as we say goodbye to one of our journalists who is moving further into the frigid north. We’ll miss her and her joyful insight into all that is BTS.
This special issue is available now as an eMagazine!
The Mustang Post 